Julkåseri, eller
 Idag blev jag varse att det snart är jul:
Planeringen av julnumret pågår för fullt. Vill du vara med i år också?
Hälsningar
Per Leino
Gotlands Allehanda
Broväg 21
621 23 Visby
Jag har bidragit med jultexter till GA i många år nu. Och som jag har dyrkat julen, skrivit om tindrande barnaögon, traditioner och annat fint.  Lasse Christoffersson brukar rita åt mig och vi brukar få en helsida. Det är mycket jobb. Mycket ångest.
Hela Ã¥ret har jag nu gÃ¥tt och tänkt pÃ¥ jultexter. Jag har nästan tänkt att jag nog är ganska mätt pÃ¥ julen. Förra Ã¥ret skrev jag en riktigt bra text om dricke, med lite genusperspektiv. Jag tänkte dÃ¥ att nu är det sista gÃ¥ngen. Jag kan inte mer.Â
Men så kom det här mejlet idag. Vill du vara med i år också? Och onekligen blir man lite sporrad.
Men jag är ju sÃ¥ jävla trött pÃ¥ julen? Trött pÃ¥ att sitta uppe nästan till morgonen innan julafton och slÃ¥ in klappar. Trött pÃ¥ att kliva upp i svinottan för att lasta bilen, väcka barnen, tjata pÃ¥ dem fina kläder, se H stressa runt och fodra djuren, lämna gullekatten ensam, laga maten och komma pÃ¥ sätt att varmhÃ¥lla den tills man kommer fram till rätt destination. Trött pÃ¥ alla meningslösa julklappar som kostar en massa pengar. Trött pÃ¥ julen! Men det kan man ju inte skriva om i ett julkÃ¥seri?Â
I stället borde man vara tacksam över att man ingÃ¥r i en stor familj. Att mÃ¥nga vill fira med en. Och visst är det roligt…..
Men jisses, vad ska jag svara? Vad ska jag skriva om? Här är några förslag:
1. Hemmansägaren och svÃ¥gern went bonkers at Vesterby. Efter det att julklapparna är utdelade och barnen är upptagna med dem gör de champagne av vitt vin i morsans Soda Stream och sedan har de en tävling i vem som kan knäcka valnötter mot pannan? SvÃ¥gerns mor, som mÃ¥ste vila med jämna mellanrum, lÃ¥g i en soffa under en filt och njöt av tävlingarna och tÃ¥vlingarna. Man sÃ¥g hur hon skrattade gott där under sin filt. Och mamma tyckte det var kul hon ocksÃ¥, när hon insÃ¥g att en Soda Stream hÃ¥ller för diverse pÃ¥frestningar.Â
Nej, det kan man inte skriva om. Att man dricker champagne på julen. Nej, fy. Då ska man ju bara knäcka nötter och dansa ringdans.
2. Kvällen innan julafton går strömmen vid Hägsarve, det blir kortis i proppskåpet. Hela fastigheten mörkläggs. Det blir svart som i ett sotararsle, som Hemmansägaren brukar säga. (Kan man säga sotararsle i ett julkåseri? Tveksamt.) Bara i sommarköket fungerar elen. Jag får, i panik, flytta ut all julmat vi lagat dit. Jag flyttar mat och flyttar mat. Gabbe och Vero kommer och lagar elen. Vi dricker vin och dricker vin och på julaftons morgon har vi hvdvärk.
Nej, det var inte passande.
3. Jag stressar halvt ihjäl mig till jul, köper mer än jag borde. Slår in rim och paketerar skinka. När julafton kommer så somnar jag i en soffa.
Inte så juligt.
4. Mamma och jag bestämmer oss för att gå på julotta. Vi kommer, gåendes (!) till Klinte kyrka en timme innan andakten ska börja. Det är mörkt. Jäkligt mörkt. Vi snubblar runt bland gravarna, fryser och försöker fördriva tiden.
Hur juligt är det på en skala?
Nej, det var inte heller kul.
Vad vill man läsa om i ett julkåseri egentligen? Vad är passande? Ska jag tacka nej?
Hemmansägaren tycker jag ska be om en veckas betänketid. Kommer det att hjälpa?
Mien
november 11th, 2009 at 10:05 f m
Julångesten florerar visst lite överallt, inte bara vid Stenstugu. /Ingrid
PS Jag tycker du har ett ganska bra kåseri här! DS
november 11th, 2009 at 10:25 f m
Haha, jag minns den där kvällen när elen gick och det luktade brännt av plast och elektricitet, vilket är en väldigt otrevlig och oroande lukt!
Och jag hade väldigt dåligt samvete dagen därpå för att vi söp er under bordet natten innan julafton, men attans var trevligt vi hade
Fast jag och Gabbe var också rätt bleka om nosen på julafton, vilket i och för sig bara var bra för barnen, eftersom vi bara orkade sitta och titta och prata med dem, och inte var i gasen själva alls.
När det gäller julkåseri så kan du väl fundera på saken, dessutom:
1. du är verkligen inte är gnällig!
2. att du skriver så mycket roligt på den här bloggen att nåt måste du väl kunna vaska fram som passar?
3. be redaktionen bre på lite mer! Om du känner dig smickrad av det där torra korta mejlet så förstår jag att du inte får så mycket uppskattning från det där hållet.
Kunde de inte Ã¥tminstone sagt “Mien, du är sÃ¥ himla bra och vi vill gärna att du skriver vÃ¥rt julkÃ¥seri, snälla, vÃ¥ra läsare kommer sakna det annars.”
NÃ¥t sÃ¥nt tycker jag nog de kunde klämt i med. “Vill du vara med i Ã¥r ocksÃ¥”, hallÃ¥ liksom! har karln rymt frÃ¥n nÃ¥gon finsk dramafilm eller? mÃ¥ste man vara sÃ¥ korthuggen! Pfft!!!
november 11th, 2009 at 1:36 e m
Jag håller med Ingrid! Putsa och lägg till lite på det här så är bekymret ur världen! hälsar en som inte har ´julat´på många år! Jo, jag har ljus i en av de stora växande granarna utanför, slingan sitter för 3:e säsongen nu! Att sårken kummar haim är jul nog för mig.
november 11th, 2009 at 5:58 e m
Haha vad du e rolig Mien. Tror alla kan känna igen sig i dina exempel och varför inte skriva om en sÃ¥dan “annorlunda men normal” jul? Imorgon ska vi hämta Ricco, det ser jag verkligen fram emot o nu hittar jag till Brukshundsklubben oxÃ¥…
november 12th, 2009 at 9:47 f m
Du har väl haft din skörd av eländiga jular helt enkelt…
Jag minns en med dej i nackkrage och kvaddad bil. Jag minns en annan med Jonas ben i gips. Jag har hört talas om en tredje med magsjuka i Pite…
Julen kanske inte är din bästa högtid ändå? Nyår kanske?
november 13th, 2009 at 10:20 f m
Oj, tack för alla fina kommentarer!
Ingrid;
Jag har faktiskt anmält mig som kåseriskrivare i år också!
Vero;
Ha, ha ha, rymt från någon finsk dramafilm! Läste faktiskt upp det för några från GA som var förbi jobbet och tog några bilder på mig och mina elever. GA-människorna höll på att garva ihjäl sig.
Anna-Stina;
Visst är det så, barn och djur är det viktigaste för en mysig jul.
Anki!
Har Ricco kommit än? Är så nyfiken.
Julia;
Ha, ha ha, I think you got a point there! Men du glömde blodproppen. Vi fick ju tillbringa hela juldagen på las för att jaga en blodpropp som satt sig i din brors blåsvullna fot. De hade julgran på akuten minns jag.
Mien
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